Frenemies

A friendship as cuddly as a catus.

Starting Dialogue
Friend: Thanks for inviting me over! I wasn’t sure if we ever were going to hang out.

You: Yeah! Thanks for sending me 37 text messages about it so I wouldn’t forget.

Ending Dialogue
Friend: I LITERALLY can’t believe that story you just told.

You: Yeah, it was pretty crazy.

Friend: Oh, this is awkward! I mean I don’t believe it. Are you sure you remember it correctly?

Starting Dialogue
Friend: I just wanted to say how much I admire your boldness. Not everyone can pull off that look!

You: Thanks! Wait, what look?

Friend: Exactly! It’s so raw and unfinished. Dumpy-chic, if you will.

Ending Dialogue
You: SO GREAT hanging out with you! Maybe next time we can talk about something more substantial, though? JK! I love our little chats.

Friend: Sure! I was just trying to talk about stuff you could understand.

Starting Dialogue
Friend: I took a neat personality test yesterday. Want me to send the link to you?

You: Did you get “narcissist”? Just kidding, hahaha!

Friend: I love how funny you are! Your sense of humor is so far out there that you might say it isn’t even humor.

Ending Dialogue
Friend: I guess it’s time for me to leave. Your eyes are looking kind of tired and baggy.

You: Wow, you’re so observant. Too bad you can’t use that power to pick up on social cues.

Friend: Bye! Have a great day!

Starting Dialogue
You: Before I forget, I got something for your upcoming birthday.

Friend: Wow, thank you! Oh, anti-aging cream?

You: It’s never too early to start, especially for someone who frowns as much as you do. Like right now! You’re welcome.

Ending Dialogue
Friend: I’m glad we’re friends! This news article headline says you should surround yourself with positive people.

You: Did you even read the whole article or did you just read the headline and send it anyway?

Friend: If I read the whole article, I’m sure it would have been depressing and then I couldn’t be the positive person you need in your life.

Starting Dialogue
Friend: So glad you wanted to hang out! Let’s take Simstagram stories together!

You: Ooh, I don’t know if we’re at combined Simstagram stories level of friendship yet.

Friend: Too late! I got a video of you saying that, so now all I need is an animated GIF of a crying potato and... posted!

Ending Dialogue
Friend: Are you sure you don’t want to see any more pictures of the dinner I ate last night? The dessert was pretty fancy!

You: No, I have... um... ants! An ant problem.

Friend: Oh yeah, you don’t want to share your home with something that annoying.

Starting Dialogue
Friend: Oh, hey. Did you get the invitation to my party? It says you saw it at 2:06 PM.

You: Oh, yeah! I’ll totally definitely be there, but if I’m not, it doesn’t mean we aren’t friends because we totally are.

Friend: Totally! You’re my closest friend.

Ending Dialogue
You: Always nice of you to drop by!

Friend: It’s always nice to get out of the house and exercise once in a while. You should try it!

Starting Dialogue
You: I was thinking of volunteering at the hospital to do something productive with my spare time.

Friend: That’s so nice! Oh, you can tell them that story that always puts me to sleep.

You: That was me trying to have a conversation with you, but you fell asleep when we stopped talking about you.

Ending Dialogue
Friend: Does our friendship mean anything to you? Like if I was falling off a cliff, would you save me?

You: Hmm. For this scenario, you first have to tell me if I was the one who pushed you off the cliff.

Starting Dialogue
Friend: If you were stranded on a desert island, how many friends would you take with you? Would I be one of them?

You: Usually being stranded means you don’t get to plan ahead.

Friend: Ugh, I know we’re friends, but you really suck the fun out of stuff sometimes. Even desert island scenarios.

Ending Dialogue
Friend: I love how we’re so honest with each other. Like I can tell you I think you really slum it when it comes to romance. JK!

You: And I can tell you that your personality is like dumping a salt shaker into my mouth. JK, JK!

Starting Dialogue
Friend: I got all your text messages. You called me an “ignoramus” a lot.

You: Oh, that’s just auto correct. I meant to type “bestie”.

Ending Dialogue
Friend: I’m glad we’ve become SOOOOO close. I feel like we just finish each other’s...

You: GAH, cant you just stop talking for ONE second?! I mean... yeah, totally! Yay friends!

Rewards
[todo]